NAIJA ATM SPEAKING NIGERIAN DIALECT;

Imagine if ATMs in Naija speak our dialect
If U are in a sophisticated area like
BANANA
ISLAND, here is how the ATM would
communicate;
ATM: Welcome Mr. Adenuga.
-Please, enter your secret number.
-How much will you like to withdraw?
Thank you for banking with us, Mr.
Adenuga.
…….but if you are in a place like MUSHIN,
here is
how it will respond;
After a guy inserts his card, inputs his pin,
ATM: Haaaaaaaaaaaa, Omo Iya,
-sho wa pa?
-sho ri e wa nbe?
Guy: Mo wa pa baje baje.
ATM: Elo ni k’omo aye po jade?
(guy inputs 10,000)
ATM: (dispenses cash).
Omo Iya, ma jeun lo ntie.
In a place like IBADAN.
An Ibadan woman inserts her card, inputs
her
secret code.
ATM: (In Ibadan tone)
-Ekabo Iya,
-Se wa pa?
-So nsure?
-Elo le fe gba?
(Woman enters N2,000)
ATM: Iya, ko ma s’owo lapo yin ke!
(Woman enters N2,000 again)
ATM: Se ko nse afise?
Mo so pe ko s’owo lapo yin.
(For the third time, woman enters N2,000
again,
thinking it was an error on the ATM’s part)
ATM: (pauses for a while)
Iya, se ko re o?
-Oma saaro kutukutu ke.
-Alawin laaro ojo aje.
-Abaye nse o ni?
-To ba pe ko o to fa kadi re yo, emi ma a
gbe je ni.
-Alawin osi.
In a place like IJEBU
A woman inserts her card & pin
ATM: Omo alare,
-elo ro nfe gba?
(Woman enters N2,391.50K)
ATM: Pause for about one minute, trying to
understand the digits.
After about a minute, ATM replies,
ATM: Iya, mo nbo?
E je nsare lo wa shenji wa!